On the heels of last month’s Versus Conference, we heard time and time again: Don’t Go Alone. 

Nowhere is this more evident than in the realm in which this month’s guest, Greg Oliver, works. Greg is a certified Sexual Recovery Pastoral Counselor. This month, he shares a piece of his story in an open, honest, and transparent way, which serves as a model to all believers of how easy it is to fall into this particular addiction, how we trick ourselves into believing we can handle it on our own, and what happens when God takes hold and changes hearts and minds.

In this podcast, Greg describes poignantly that temptations of the flesh often take place because of unexamined and unchecked triggers. Maybe it’s stress, anxiety, depression, or even boredom. Those are all things that we men think we need to hide away from others because a “real” man wouldn’t let his emotions be known. But if we take the time to examine ourselves under God’s lens, we will see a different picture – one where all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. One where no matter our sin, God loved us enough to sacrifice His own Son to save us, so that we no longer have to be slaves to sin but free from the bondage of it. 

Through his story of recovery, Greg highlights the need to bring our struggles into the light where they no longer have the same power that they do behind closed doors. He demonstrates how our desires and worldly pursuits often leave us feeling guilt, shame, and abandonment. Yet, when we are open and transparent with those we trust, those barriers and walls start to come down, and we can hold one another accountable in ways we could never do alone. 

You see, Christian men for too long have thought they need to be a symbol of perfection, but this was never God’s design. We are not perfect, so we shouldn’t feel the need to pretend that we are. The fact of the matter is, we can’t accomplish God’s plans without ceding control to the same Almighty God. Needing help is the way God created us. We need His divine help, but we also need the help of our brothers. 

If you find yourself struggling with addiction, covetousness, lust, or any other part of your thought life, Greg encourages you to make that known to someone you trust. If you need that kind of help, seek it out. If someone comes to you in need of your help, freely give it without judgment. There is a path to recovery, but we were never meant to walk the path alone.

Next Steps

1. When you examine your thought life, what triggers do you have?

2. Have you been struggling in the shadows with a secret sin or lustful thoughts?

3. Do you have someone you trust to have this kind of openness with? If so, I encourage you to reach out to them and seek accountability.